fuckyeahseacritters:

(via fuckyeahfunnythings)

(via fuckyeahfunnythings)

Gumtree Weirdos

* * *

Santiago Beckham wants us to move into his flat, which has a seaside view apparently… in Shepherd’s Bush of all places!

* * * start email * * *

Hi Rosairo

Thanks so much for your massage and intrest,first of all am so sorry for any mistype it 2bedroom flat not 1 and the 900pounds include council tax,internet,water and gas all it left for you is to pay 1 month with the deposit 400pounds so your charges will be 1300pounds. The flat is available for 1 year depends on how many months you want to rent it.

There is something important i would like you to know,first of all, am renting out these flat just because of my sick wife that need to be operated in 1 week time which am in hurry to see a tenant to occupy the flat,if you are trully intrested am sorry to say these, we need to fix a viewing tomorrow and you need to come down with your charges which is 1300pounds because have really wested my time and money for unserious rental,coming down from berkemham to sherferbush is not an easy journey and have been disspointed several times after coming down,though have receive more than enough responce but i need the serious ones to occupy the flat. I beg of you,if trully you are eager to have it i can come down tomorrow but you will need to promise me that you are coming wit your payment which is 1300pounds or part payment,just to show for proof then we can go into the flat for viewing. Just try to understand my feelings and procedure as well.Feel free to ask me any question.

These the address of the flat…..White City Rd, White City, Shepherds Bush, London W12. Ring me on 0784XXXXXXX. Can you see those pictures.

*

elitabtediceque:

Shark-Cupcake

*

In true geek form, Mark and I started a spreadsheet of all the fun things we want to do once thesis hell is over.

*

Gauging Your Distraction

Thanks Rey for the link! This is eerily similar to the study I was going to do previously, minus the texting.

*

There are two prisons near my new flat. Hence, this conversation.

Nina: so i wonder if holloway prison is a women's prison. so that must mean pentonville is men.
Mark: pretty much. why, do want to have a secret lover in prison?
Nina: ooh, oscar wilde stayed at pentonville for awhile. as well as amy winehouse's (ex?) husband? and boy george this year. wheeeee.
Mark: what a meeting of minds that would be
Nina: let's go visit boy george.
Mark: ok. then what? free him?
Nina: nooo... he's been released! :'-(
Mark: you're not planning on going to prison now? for a crime that you didn't commit?
Nina: i'll just run to the nearest police station screaming "I DIDS IT!!!!!!!"
Mark: ha!
Nina: although i may get sent to the mental hospital instead :-/
Mark: they'd then put every unsolved crime on your head.
Nina: "I DIDS ALL OF IT!" whilst doing a victory jig.
Mark: I must see this victory jig in action
Nina: maybe i should just commit attempted murder on my boyfriend. you can come with me and make a statement.
Mark: yay!
Nina: unless that's category A
Mark: nina in prison!
Nina: in which case i should just do something annoying and mildly violent. a public fight perhaps.
Mark: like punch a nun
Nina: ooh, where's the nearest nunnery?
Mark: no idea
Nina: there's a sister act musical opening soon... i can just punch one of the extras there. same diff.